5 Things to consider before conceiving a Baby {Pregnancy}

Tags : Home >> Health >> Pregnancy

So, today, I have come up with something very different to what I used to discuss with all of you. This is for all those females who are ready for conception or even in half way through their confinement. So, lets us see what all we have on the list!!

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#DidYouKnow bad oral health can cause miscarriages. More #pregancyquestions: http://goo.gl/983LFD via @skyiseternal #perfectskincareforyou [Click to Tweet This!]

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Physical Fitness

The first thing to ascertain is that you both are physically well to conceive a new life. You should consult a doctor and get genetic carrier screening to make sure you do not suffer from any of the hereditary issues which can be carried to the baby as well. This is especially important for a mother.

Also, another specialist you should consider visiting is a dentist. Yup, your undetected gum problems and bad oral health can cause miscarriage!! In fact, it is said that a good oral routine during the pregnancy alone prevents a lot of miscarriages!! 

A doctor consultation also helps decode what medicines you might be taking and whether they should be taken or not!! And, a pre-check up is also informative about the proper dates of conception and what all other things should be kept in mind medically!! 

Healthy Lifestyle

Howsoever you might be leading a healthy or a hectic or a stressful life, you do not ever want your kid to enter the world in those circumstances. So, it is a good time to get onto the healthy schedule which you have forever been procastinating!

• Getting up early in the morning
• Skipping on the junk food and actually consuming regular HEALTHY meals all through the day
• Not stressing about anything in particular
• Exercising everyday or at least 3 times a day
• Controlling weight
• Cutting back on the caffeine
• Going to bed early

So, these are just few things which should be on your list. Btw, I would like to again stress on being back in shape and bringing your weight under control. For one, if you are overweight it puts extra stress on your spinal cord and you might get prone to backaches after your delivery. And, secondly, coming back into shape is easier if you are healthier before! 

#DidYouKnow you should not gain more than 9kgs during child bearing!!

Financial Well-being

This is in conjunction to the earlier point. You will be obviously less stressed when you do not have to think about money. So, get over your money troubles way before thinking of a baby. You would want to provide every possible luxury to them, as much as you can afford!! 

But, overspending or not being able to buy their basic needs definitely come under the not-being-financially-sound for a baby. So, do have considerable savings and be able to plan for at least next two years of budget including all the baby things which are very expensive now a days!! And, do not forget the vacations. 

Some people do think of too much like getting a house and a car and a good career and so delay the baby process. But, I would like to mention here that too much of a delay is not really good for either the baby or the parents and the car and career and your house can be accommodated along with the baby. 

When I am talking about finance, I just mean a well-settled life and having enough to spend on your family without feeling the pinch! Not waiting for your entire life to get into order. There is no perfect time for such things!!

Emotional Well-being

Now, that we have physical fitness and finances taken care of, the couple that is you both must be emotionally ready to take charge of a new life among you both. Get rid of all the family issues you might have with your extended family, among yourselves and other things. 

And, if they are unavoidable, stop creating a negative environment and stressing yourself about them. I know it is not as easy to do as to write about it but I can just say that being positive and happy is the only solution to that problem. And, both you and your spouse must be happy and accept the situation as they are. Either of you cribbing will not help!!

Environment

So, now that you are probably entirely ready, I would say consider the environment in which you would want to bring up your kid. For example, you might not be staying in the most ideal location. 

Or, you have been thinking of moving to a safer and a place where there are a lot of kids or may be closer to a school or a play school. It is better to make such decisions beforehand because last minute shifting and things might not be really possible. Similarly, have a doctor closer at hand as well. Or, a hospital.

These are just a few things which I can come up with right now which you should consider before conceiving. Now, it is your turn. What do you think are some of the things which must be considered? What have you considered, if you are already pregnant or have a baby? How did you pre-conception time come about?

Other posts which might interest you:

Exercising and Pregnancy
How to deal with insecurities during Pregnancy?
Infertility and Emotional Health

Should you do exercise when mensturating? {Women Stuff}

Ok, I would like to be convinced why we should not exercise if we are menstruating. I did a google search on this topic and I found no particular link saying you should really rest IF you do not suffer from major cramps or heavy bleeding. 

Caution: This is only for those who do not have heavy bleeding or suffer badly during those days of the month!! Please do not exercise if you have heavy PMS or mensuration. All you can do is walk in such a case. 

So, I do not really suffer from major issues during this time of the month. My blood flow is normal and I generally do not have anything major than leg pains and heavy feeling in the lower part of the body but that settles down if I rest properly.

When I did a google search, all I found was that you can walk, jog, run and even do Yoga during these days except for some of the inverted poses in the Yoga and even swim. Pranayam is specifically recommended for relaxation. Also, one can do Suryanamaskar or stretches or such exercises which do not involves stomach strains or back strain.

But, still, when I went for my Yoga classes (yup, will write about them) today, my acquaintances said I should only rest for the first three days. Now, you would obviously be interested in knowing how I managed an hour of the class.

Honestly, it wasn't too bad. Some of the exercises I totally avoided because it was straining my back but I did do many Suranamaskars and other easy ones which were mostly stretches today. And, afterward, I was feeling pretty good. And, I didn't really push myself more.

My legs weren't heavy anymore. And, this is till now. I would check till tomorrow and let you know if I did really suffer anything major after having a good/bad night sleep :) And, please do convince me if I should really avoid exercising altogether keeping in mind my state of periods. 

Any doctor's opinion would be welcome :) And, am I relying on internet more than necessary?

Infertility and Emotional Health {Women Stuff}

Infertility often creates one of the most distressing life crises that a couple has ever experienced together. The long term inability to conceive a child can evoke significant feelings of loss. I have four friends who are facing this problem and all of them are coping with this problem differently. 

The multitude of medical decisions and the uncertainties that infertility brings can create great emotional upheaval for most couples. One of my friends is so depressed because of social and family pressures that she is keeping herself in a cave, metaphorically speaking. 

But that’s not a solution to any problem. If she won’t discuss things, probably she won’t realize about the many options available. It is important to keep yourself aware at such a juncture instead of shutting down so that one can find best solution. Who knows there is a light down the tunnel?

Two of my friends are dealing with it very positively. They are not blaming themselves or each other. They take things normally and stay cheerful always. They have actually made their mind that the last thing is always in our hands and that is adoption.

I think that’s perfect because getting pregnant is not the only way to be parents. Really hats off to one of my friend who has gone through five operations and had been to all the best centres but I never saw her crying and her husband is so very supportive. 

Everyone has feelings and emotional ups and downs as they pursue infertility treatment. But being negative can always make matters worst. And I have seen women suffer more than men in these situations because of the way we are raised, the beliefs implanted in us. 

Okay, let me tell you being a mother can’t be an ultimate ambition in our life. We have so many other things to do. Even women who doesn’t want to be a mother is forced to bear child and is called inhuman or emotionless. 

Men are not pressurized that way or probably they are brought up to repress their feelings or keep it to themselves. Because, they must be feeling the same pain but trying to be a strong and chivalrous lest they be taken not that much of man as they are supposed to be. 

Well, whatever problems we may have, we should not stop living our life. Don’t keep on postponing your vacation or take your career and relationships for granted. This is something I would totally agree with because I can see some people doing it for some unforeseen future. Its good to be optimistic but that's of no use if you can't live your present. 

Amazing post, Punam. Its very difficult to put such issues in words if one has never been through it. Oh btw guys, don't forget to check out Punam's homemade talcum powder.

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Vaginal Hygiene {Women Stuff}

This is one topic I have been thinking for long to write but was too shy to write :D Whether you are married or not, you need to take care of your hygiene. Anyways, lets get on with it. 

Hairlessness
Pubic hair is actually a protection for the sensitive area but unfortunately, it also increases the unhygienic conditions. So, its best to get rid of it. Shaving is one of the easiest, painless and safest ways to get rid of the hair. 

Brazilian wax is a good alternative if you have the courage to bear the pain. Avoid hair removal creams as they are very harsh on the skin and can cause itching or any other infection.

Make sure its dry
After a bath, when you don the undergarments, make sure that the area is entirely dry. Also, whenever you use the wash room, you can take care that to let the area be dry and undergarments do not get wet. Panty liners are a good choice if you have the issue of discharge.

Occasionally, when you are at home, especially at night, its a good idea to go without the undergarments. That helps with keeping the area clean and also ensures the area gets proper air circulation for an extended period.

Those Days
Ah, the pain of periods...as if the days are not enough, its very very important to clean the area and keep on changing the pads to keep the area dry. Otherwise, it can breed bacteria. If you area itches, you can take it for a sure signal that it needs some care.

Do not use harsh soaps or body washes
These days many companies are coming up with medicated washes for the area specially. I haven't used them yet but I guess handmade soaps can be gentle enough. But, its advised that only plain water is enough to keep the area clean.

Keep a check
If you see major discharge of yellow color, you need to go to a doctor. Also, any foul smell means your diet is probably getting more acidic or less water in the system or some other health issue. So, always keep a check on what happens to your body. Its a good way to determine the health of your body.

Wash your undergarments regularly
This is very important for people staying in hostels and PG's. Always make sure that you launder your UG's immediately. Leaving them without washing breeds bacteria and makes the area unclean as well.

Hope this helps :) And, do share your tips for hygienic living!!

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And, I am leaving for Delhi today so adieu Hyderabad till 19th!! And, also, I have scheduled the posts till then as I might not come online at all. So, keep commenting and dropping in your mails. I would love to read them when I shall be back. Take Care!!

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My beauty after baby? {Women Stuff}

This is continuation from yesterday's post. Ok, so, this was one of the issues which came up when discussing pregnancy. How does it affect a woman over in the physical ways?? Weight gain and stretch marks seem to be most prominent issues. Also, energy levels get reduced.

Let's talk about Energy first!!

A couple's age also affects their ability to keep up with children. As life expectancy lengthens, it's easy to forget that age matters. It's tempting to enjoy as many adventures and experiences as we can during the same years that our parents and grandparents were already diapers-deep into the parenting enterprise.

Unfortunately it's much easier to achieve a lifestyle of endless youth than it is to keep our bodies from aging. But, having babies at the right time ensures that the biological clock of the body remains proper and that affects the energy levels in the body. As you get older, the energy levels do reduce whether we want to accept it or not.

Weighty Issues

The scale can be scary during pregnancy, but a large percentage of that weight is the baby and surrounding fluids — meaning it will be gone by the time you get home from the hospital. As for the remaining weight, a lot of it can be eliminated by calorie-burning breastfeeding and easier-than-you-think exercises.

Like walking — you’d be surprised at the ways in which taking a stroll can help you. I had normal weight till 3 months after my pregnancy. I put on when I had that heavy full of home-made butter Indian food (which sounds very yummy) that is necessary as per our mothers and ignored working out believing I haven't put on yet then why to worry?

So weight is all in our control and regular exercise during and after pregnancy eases out the weight loss. And, regular exercise also helps in normal delivery and keeping your body fit. Also, I have a separate post outlining those benefits so watch out for that!!!  

Stretchy Feeling?

Don’t worry about stretch marks because there are so many creams and lotions available in the market for them and you can improve elasticity of skin beforehand only, even before getting pregnant. I had used Bio Oil which my hubby got from Belgium which I think helped me a lot.

So, that was my experience in a nutshell :) Hope this was helpful for all of you. I will be back with many other posts on pregnancy. Watch out and in the meantime, don't forget to check out my blog as well :)

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My dilemma with becoming a mother {Women Stuff}

Hey, Nidhi. I am Punam and read your comment on becoming mother dilemma so thought of sharing my experience. To be a mother is always a huge responsibility and even I had loads of confusion when I was about to be a mother.

In my situation, it was all our decision to have a baby and others saying its too early because we had been married for only a year and half!! I was afraid of the responsibilities and wanted to learn how to run and take care of home before I became a mom.

Those days, even though ours was a love marriage, we used to have enough heated discussions to make me reluctant to go for a baby. I always used to think that excess of arguments between me and my husband means there is less understanding and that's not good for the baby.

In a nut shell, I wanted to have a few years for ourselves to understand each other before we expanded the family. But, then, the question came to whether the disagreements would ever end? I mean howsoever much you might love or understand a person, everyone has their own opinion.

Me and my mom also fight till date even though we have a 27 year old relationship not considering her being my mom fact!! First Advantage: Our relationship and understanding improved with the baby. Second Advantage: Kids become THE ultimate excuse

I always used to have this complaint that I will have no time for myself after having a baby. But, the truth is I have more time myself now as I have everybody to help me and they give me my own space. I have more servants now to help me because they think I have more work.

If you tend to be a little on the late side for social events and really hate having to iron, guess what? You have a built-in excuse for tardiness, slovenly dressing, and a whole host of other things. "Sorry, but with the baby and all, it's practically impossible to [fill in the blank]." Hell, you'll even get to leave boring parties early! :D 

So, these are a few things which I found changed after having my little angel :) Hope, this helps you. I do have few other things to mention in another post. So, watch out for that. And, in the meanwhile, you can always visit my own blog. I recently did an EOTD and a post on bumps after waxing!!

Other posts from Punam:

Hair Care during and after Pregnancy
Lakme Perfect Radiance Intense Whitening Capsules Treatment

Should I go for a baby or not? {Women Stuff}

The reason why I am writing this post is because of a comment by one of the readers Nidhi. She wrote this -

hi Swati
i do not know whether my comment(question) would be apt here or not..but i would like to know ..is becoming a mother a good thing ?
i mean..i feel scared with all the responsibilities,pain,stretch marks,no time for self..and the list goes on.
my family is pressurising me and i do not know what is right ?
i love kids..may be am just scared of the responsibilities..but i want to know what good things happen after you become a mother (so that i can convince myself :)

First of all, any question or doubt you might have you can always speak of it so feel free to comment :) And, yes, thank you for putting up such a major issue. In fact, one of my colleagues is also going through the same phase.

She has been married for three years and now, the pressure from both sides of her family is impossible for hear to bear, in fact so much that she thinks it better to get a baby and relieved of the burden. But, the real wish was known when she suddenly started having her periods after a long spell and she shared with me how relieved she felt after that. Clearly, she is not mentally ready for it.

Now, to answer your question, I would ask another question. Do you think you are afraid of the responsibilities which come up with motherhood? Or, is it that you think its too soon and you would like to spend more time with your husband?

If its the first, the answer is obvious that you will never be "READY" for it. So, go ahead, plan a baby and with time, you will feel you have made the right decision. It will also help you to know many women do that and they never regret their decision :)

Now, the second alternative is a bit more complicated. It depends on how well you know your husband, how much of a relationship you share, how long you have been married, what were your aspirations and expectations with regards to your marriage. 

Essentially, if you have been married just for a year or your age is around 25 or less (not that I mean you should be pregnant if you hit 26!) or are a person who likes to take her own time to do everything in life, I would say wait for the right moment. In these cases, the intuition or the gut instinct of a person really helps. If you are that kinds, I would say it might do you good to wait.

So, Nidhi, the answer is that go to a gynaecologist and take a proper session with her about motherhood - the physical changes it demands from you, talk with your friends who might have kids (if you are first, I know how tough is that decision), talk to your husband, discuss all your fears and everything with him, know his mind and what he wants. 

Take time to decide but first know your own mind as to exactly what you want because ultimately its you who is going to bear the baby. I have also asked Punam to write something about it and incidentally she has the same story like yours so probably, you might be able to relate to her. The post should be coming in some days :)

And, to all your mothers and married ladies, what do you think about the most important decision in your life? Don't forget to comment and help out Nidhi :)

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Heart and Cardiovascular Diseases in Women? {Women Stuff}

Today is World's Heart Day. So, I am borrowing this article from The Hindu Magazine, September 23, 2012. They had published a small article on how to take care of the heart. I shall try not to infringe on the copyright and am again asserting that this post may end up being a copy of the article. So, the entire credit for the post goes to the Hindu newspaper.

Symptoms of CVD in women feeling of discomfort between breasts or behind breastbone pain radiating over arms, back, neck, jaw or stomach shortness of breath, weakness or fatigue unusual anxiety or nervousness indigestion or nausea  sudden sweating, dizziness and collapse

Cardiovascular diseases are getting more prominent in women. Its no longer a man's disease!!!Its especially dangerous if you smoke, drink or lead a sedentary life or have high blood pressure or sugar or cholesterol levels or are under huge amount of stress due to personal and professional problems.

In fact, even children are at risk from the condition called Cogenital Heart Defect. The improper development of heart during the pregnancy can result in this. Mothers who do not take care of themselves or their diet during pregnancy have a high risk of having children with this defect. Also, if you are a diabetic, your child is prone to heart-related problems.

How to Prevent? Be physically active!!! Walk or exercise daily. Avoid salt, sugar and fatty foods. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables.  Maintain a healthy weight.   Quit smoking and avoid respiratory irritants.  Limit or stop alcohol.  If you have lung problem, get influenza vaccination annually.

The reason for these heart diseases are mainly the fatty deposits on the walls of the arteries. Interestingly, these deposits may occur on both the inner walls as well as the outer walls. And, in fact, there is absolutely no cure to remove the deposits on the Outer walls of the arteries so that makes weight management and diet a very important consideration in life.

If the arteries are blocked even partially due to these deposits, the blood flow is not smooth to the heart and heart may fall short of adequate oxygen and other nutrients needed to function properly. When this blockage gets severe, it can result in heart attack. Women of 50-52 are at more risk and especially if there has been a family history of coronary diseases.

So, how do you take care of your heart?
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Is dark so ugly? {Beauty Philosophy}

Well, this certainly does not apply to women alone but let me say that maximum racism is carried out by women only! Ok, I might be termed a misogynist for this statement. But, seriously, maximum number of times in my life, only women have pointed out that I am dark and therefore ugly!

Anyways, why this post was prompted was because of my increasing concern towards my readers! Oh no, I am not altruistic. But, recently, I have started getting so many queries regarding how to become fair. Well, if you are a 10 plus something, I am fine with such questions. But, the unfortunate thing is that mommies are becoming paranoid for their 1-2 month old babies' complexions as well.

First, I am NOT making fun of you. Second, I am seriously concerned. Third, hear me out.

I totally understand where all this concern is coming from. Years and years of ill-treatment due to complexion differences more often result in such kind of anxieties. So, let me first reply to all those queries. PLEASE DO NOT BE CONCERNED. The babies and kids tend to change their skin color. In fact, skin color changes for even adults. So, keep their skin care routines healthy and simple and apply sunscreen regularly for kids above 2 years or ask a dermatologist or a paediatrician.

Now, coming to voicing my concerns, I think that we can not change the old mindset but we can lay down the new rules. We as the propagator of the future generations need to get over our insecurities and make sure our kids do not carry the same inferiority complexes which were drilled into us by the society. If at all, they should be taught how to fight and not feel bad for someone's comments. Because, there will always be one person who will speak ill. Because, there will always be some or the other struggle they have to undergo. And, because, we are better equipped in understanding our kids psychologies thanks to our own experiences.

So, instead of thinking how to deal with the issue, we should teach them how to face the challenges gracefully. And, this is just a small matter of complexion. I very strongly believe that any hesitation on the part of the parent gets conveyed to the kid somehow even if none of them actually understand what it is and that hesitation does manifest in the kid as he grows older.

So, this is my earnest request to all parents of all generations to please not get bothered by little things as complexions and clothes and rather focus on developing self-confidence and self-esteem in the child. And, this process actually starts since the conception of the baby! And, please do not take this post as a lesson in parenting. I do not have a kid of my own neither I have brought up any sibling of mine but these are some parenting rules I live by and would carry them out on my progeny.

What do you all think? Is it our responsibility to change the perspective of future generations or not?

PS: Please note that this post is not meant to hurt any sentiments. On the other hand, I respect them all and understand them!

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Are we the modern India? {Women Stuff}

Today I am in no mood for writing a beauty post. Somehow, the inspiration is still elusive :( I have so long a list of things to accomplish and I feel so lazy to do anything! Anyways, leaving my rantings aside, I would like to talk about a friend of mine who is going through a bit of rough patch.

No, I am not going to reveal any personal details but what she is going through resonates so deeply with the so-called traditions and all blah blah that it makes me wonder what traditions really are? So, without further ado, lemme start her story.

Her marriage got fixed with a guy whom her parents selected. She and the guy liked each other and before formal affirmation, they had spent a lot of time on phone calls and met without informing the family. That is all ok. And, small small incidents happen in every family!

But, the highlight came when the MIL went with her daughters to a boutique and totally negated the reception dress designs already instructed by the bride. And, without informing anyone!!

Then, she went to the bride's house and asked to be shown all the jewellery bought by her. And, expressed her frank opinions and if you haven't got the drift, she was bluntly rude! For which, my friend could not control her anger and blasted back!

Whatever followed was not really pleasant and my friend received some warnings from her future MIL akin to the saas-bahu sagas made famous by Ekta Kapoor. I just was wondering why is the concept of arranged marriages and dowry and status and what not, given so much importance in front of the girl and her nature and her education and her values!

Is not the girl a human being who should be treated with respect instead of a prize or an item to be displayed? What was my friend's fault? She just wanted to buy things and wear things which she likes without being judged for everything! Why is it that the bride is always looked with so much curiosity and unless she is mindblowingly beautiful, is judged for whatever small step she takes!

Or, is it just the chemistry of IL's and the bride which shall never improve on Earth? Why is not a girl allowed to get married without any stress and tensions? As it is, marriage is a life-altering decision and its not like she is gonna be married ever again so why not leave everything on her?

Its just sad to see how stressed my friend looks and its no where near the glowing-bride rosy picture! I wish people from the older generation realize that ultimately marriage is a joining of two people and happiness should be the ultimate outcome.

What do you say? Have you seen anyone going through almost same scenario or have you been through one? Do you think its the bride's fault or should the MIL's be more restrained?

PS: Ok, don't hate me for the cartoons! They were just too good to be ignored :D

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Gynaec consultation before marriage {Bridal Files}

I am reviving the bridal files after a long hiatus. As I have earlier also explained, writing about something which I have never been through does not really come easy to me. Now, how did this come?

One of my colleague is getting married soon and we were just discussing about the various issues involved in a relationship. So, there are a few points I thought would be good if everyone knows about them.

Pre-poning or Post-poning of Periods

Well, having periods around the D-day is most inconvenient, not to mention it is forbidden to sit in pujas at that time! So, always keep a track of your periods during that time.

Also, if they are by any chance falling around the same time, better consult a gyneac on how to postpone or prepone them. I would suggest preponing so that you are over with them when the actual ceremonies start.

How to avoid conception?

Well, this can be done before or after marriage. But, if you are sure you do not want to conceive right away, it is always good to consult a gyneac to know the ways of avoiding the errors. I would suggest the couple to go together!

Medical Test before Marriage

This is something I have discussed long before. Getting a thorough checkup of the reproductive system done beforehand for both bride and groom would avoid a lot of unfortunate events in the later life.

These are a few pointers right now in my mind. Please feel free to add more to them. I know this might sound very obvious or you might die with embarrassment just thinking about the idea of discussing these issues with the prospective groom or bride but it is practical and its always good to be aware.

What do you think? Should one go for such consultations or not?

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Do you think you feel more attractive during periods? {Women Stuff}

I know that those few days of the month are really horrible and most of the girls are simply in no mood to take care of themselves. But, yesterday, I came across a different point of view.

My friend said that she had read somewhere that during those days of the month, there is a glow on the face of the girl and she is supposed to be more attractive to the opposite sex.

 

Apparently, at this time, there is a chemical production which gives a unique scent off the body which is attractive to the male species. Well, I don't know if any of this is exactly true and I have not yet bothered to google about it. If I do find any evidence, I shall let you know!!

Anyways, the above story of not googling is a story of the past. I was curious and in the middle of an extremely boring meeting and on the verge of falling asleep, I decided its a topic worth googling on.

And, guess what, its not the days when you are menstruating but the days when you are ovulating that you have a glow on the face and give off the unique odor and attract the opposite sex. This is in ritual to the mating of the jungle law.

The time when you are ovulating, you are ready for breeding and that is when the mating actually takes place among the animals. And, though humans have evolved, the primal instincts and rules still apply. It means fertility is more attractive to the opposite gender. And, thus, the females are more attractive than usual at least once a month!

So, did you know about this? 

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